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I am not Anti-Social, I just feel like Being by Myself

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I have picked these three quotes as a way to really simplify the wonderful worded rant that you are about to read her on this blog. I really do struggle with wanting to be around people,and really wanting my own space. I get extremely angry,and dare I say feel shameful when people suggest I am anti-social,or that I must be a soon to be serial killer who is going to shoot up a school. Ok,maybe that last one went a little to far but it is how I sometimes feel. Like the fabulous Audrey Hepburn said I don’t want to be alone,I want to be left alone. Sometimes I like being alone so I can gather my thoughts,so I can think about my next move, so I can reflect on my day. I like being alone because I really learn about myself. People who constantly have to have somebody around them really irritate and annoy me,especially if they are clingy. I enjoy being around a group of people, I really do but once in awhile I need my me time. I hate that we always have to think the kid by themselves is anti-social unfriendly,and worse a killer. That is not always the case. Sometimes they could be in a situation that is uncomfortable,or like most of my childhood around people they just do not like. I am writing this rant because I am tired of people saying I am anti-social. I have thin skin sure,and I am a drama queen you bet your ass I am but anti-social no. I am also writing for my own sake. I use to believe that I was anti-social because I liked staying at home on Saturdays but then I realized I liked staying at home because i could catch up on my shows,and my books I was desperate to read. I would rather not go to that family members event because they are constantly surrounded by negative people. I do not want to go to that party,because everyone there is cheap and nasty. i do not want to be alone, I want to be left alone. Well said Audrey

Deconstructing Beyonce

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Like many young gay boys I have a female singer who I really idolize,and that singer for me is the amazing Beyonce. Straight out of Houston Texas with her girl group Destinys Child Beyonce has changed the game. I love me some Queen B. I think she is so talented, I love her work ethic,and her songs really have always spoke to me. I liked how she is always about her business,and a damn good performer. However, in the past few years I will admit I have changed some of my views about her over the years. Ever since elevator gate I have changed how I use to see Bey. I now see a talented woman who is just like everyone else. She has family problems, marriage problems,and overall she is still trying to remain at the top. She constantly has had to deal with rumors saying she is a sellout,she is not black enough,her body parts are fake,she used a surrogate,and the most disturbing one she is a devil worshiper and is apart of the Illuminati. I have also been slight annoyed with how some of her fans attack anyone who even by accident may offend Beyonce. The Beehive scares me and I am a Beyonce fan,hell they may even scare Beyonce. I love Beyonce,but if someone else does not like Beyonce I do not think they should be attacked if the reason they do not like her is fair and balanced. It is also slightly annoying when other artist put themselves below Beyonce like Adele dedicating her whole speech for album of the year to Beyonce,but not saying nothing about her fans. I fear that all the media attention Beyonce gets she is of danger of becoming over exposed. So yes my thought on this talented woman have changed drastically over the years. I still think she s one of the best singers to ever hit the stage,but I also realize she has her haters,her detractor,her crazy supporters,and even she has made some terrible mistakes over the years. Basically I realized that she is just like us,who only want to be successful in life and realize that success comes with allot of baggage.

The Trolls

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So I just encountered my first internet troll. It was a badge of honor and slightly disappointing. It was a badge of honor for me because I handled myself well. This person did not upset me in anyway however because I am smart enough to separate a loser posting negative comments and someone with legitimate criticism. I was sad though because for the first time I understand how some of these celebrities and well known you tubers feel when they say that people love trolling them. It is honestly not a pleasant feeling. I was shocked at the words this person was using to try and hurt me,and I did not even know this person. I see this as part of a bigger problem. The world is so overwhelmingly negative right now, that we are becoming a much ruder society. We have always loved to tear people down but now we love to tear them down and shred them to pieces and eat them. The trolls in my life were always face to face and I am grateful for that. It gave me good practice about what to do with the internet trolls I know I will meet the higher I go in my life. These trolls really love causing drama,and being as mean as possible. However, I cannot stand the people who egg the trolls on. They are the ones who I despise the most. They are ok with someone trolling until it happens to them,and grantee it will happen to them.  I am not gone give excuses for trolling but I will say that if we would become nicer to each other and actually talk to one another I bet you trolling would be as down as Trump approval ratings.

What joining Reddit has taught Me

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I have recently joined the website Reddit which is a place where you can have conversations with anybody about whatever topic you want. That topic could be sex,drugs,politics,world news anything. I joined because I wanted to have conversations about controversial topics that people around either are to ignorant about,or are to scared to say out loud. Since joining I have learned allot of things about myself from joining Reddit. I learned if I have an opinion I better be prepared to back it up. I also have learned that everyone has opinions and sometimes it truly is best to just agree to disagree. That there are people in this world who are just like me,with the same problems,and interest,and humor as me. That it can be alittle scary talking to people you do not know on the internet,but for the most part the people I talked to are actually nice,well informed people. I have also learned I am not right on every issue which is the hardest lesson for me that I have learned because I hate when people point out I was wrong about something. I learned spelling does count. The most unfortunate thing I have learned is there are trolls everywhere you go and it really is best to ignore them. By far the most important thing Reddit showed me was that in 2017 it truly is possible to sit and have a grown up conversation without resorting to name calling and threats. That is something the comment section on Youtube and Facebook need to pick up. Reddit really has helped me in my goal and I recommend people join it if they truly want to start a conversation

The Problem with Privilege

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Everyday it seems we hear about privilege. There is straight privilege,christian privilege,male privilege,and of course white privilege. Now to be fair mostly white christian men have had allot of privilege in The history of the United States. There is absolute nothing wrong with stating that fact. The problem is it has become weaponized,and it is being used to bully,and stifle debate. I am alittle tired of being told because I am a black gay man I am on the bottom of the food chain. That I need special help to get to the top. That everyone has to pity me. For the record I am just speaking for myself not other black or gay people. My problem with being told this is I am expected to just go along with this and not ask questions or even point out some flaws in some peoples arguments. Everytime I have done this I have been called a house nigga,or an uncle Tom.Not all people of color or gay people think alike,and to go forward with an idea it has to be  scrutinized if it has any hope of lasting. I also do not like how some white people are afraid to talk to me,because they feel they might say something racist. I have actually had to calm some of my white peers down when they asked me where I was from,because they thought by asking me that were implying i was not from this country. It has become quite annoying to be frankly honest. I also do not like how people forget that everyone is privileged over another person in our society. Yes i am black and gay but I am in college, I have a job, and I am not homeless or missing any limbs. I cannot say that for the old army vet who sleeps on the park bench around the corner from my house. I feel we are so caught up in privilege we ultimately have forgotten how to treat one another. I really do not believe all white people are racist,or that if someone does not look someone in the eye that means they are racist. I feel like stuff like that is silly and it cheapens the word racist,or sexiest,or homophobic. Yes all of those things exist but can we please stop trying to pull examples out of thin air. The bottom line is privilege does exist,and we can talk about it,however we need to do it in a way that is respectful of all opinions,that is not being used to shame people,and does not trivialize things. In other words we need ot have a grown up discussion.

Let These Boys Wear Whatever they Want Please!!!

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Lil Uzi, Jaden Smith,and Lil Yacty there is something they all have in common. Yes they are all rappers but they also like to gender bend when it comes to clothes. It really started with Jaden Smith wearing dresses in 2016 as part of the Louis Viuitton campaign.It drew allot of backlash and praise,but mostly backlash. The same can be said for Lil Yachty and his colorful braids or lil Uzi who likes to wear blouses and purses. Now they have all been accused of doing this for attention , which they might be doing,however I feel like it is genuine. These young men do not fit in with what traditionally hip hop is or represents. They do not have a thug persona,and for the most part they are not super masculine. They regularity smile,dance,and are extremely weird and for me that is a breath of fresh air. I was not even conceived when Prince,and Michael Jackson were at the height of their careers. They too caused a scene with their feminine clothing especially Prince. I think I care about this issue because I am not very masculine. I to have been criticized for not being the traditional black man. i smile, I dance,I am weird, I do not like sports, I love pop music,and I have no swagger. I am an eccentric black nerd and I love it. I admit I get excited when I see Jaden rocking that dress on the red carpet [even though sometimes I wish he had a stylist],and I get hella defensive when someone tries to bash him or anyone else who likes to gender bend clothes. If you do not like what the person is wearing then do not look at it. I think I am to easily offended with this topic because like I said I am not masculine,and I know what it is like to be thrown insults at when you do not fit the criteria of what is acceptable. That is why I hope Jaden and these other boys are not doing this strictly for attention,that would break my heart. I hope they are truly being themselves,and ignoring the haters and hopefully they will hire a stylist.

What Bow Wow Taught Me about Fame and Celebrity

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I have been waiting to write this in my blog because I really did not think it was worth blogging about at first. However, after reading Youtube comments I realized it is worth blogging about. A few weeks ago rapper and actor Bow Wow was caught lying about how he was on a private plane but really he was flying on a regular plane. This started the #bowowowchallenge where people were posting images which mad eit look like they were living an extravagant life but really they were not. Bow Wow who it seems is the king of taking Ls was of course insulted and he made many videos saying he was being setup which led to him getting mocked even more. An interview has appeared where Bow Wow seems to be saying that Trey Songz,Chris Brown,Ciara,and Omarion were all put on by him. Needless to say most of twitter including Chris Brown called that claim bs. Now after LMAO about the whole situation I will say this Bow Wow did have a point. I remember when I fist heard of Chris Brown,or Trey Songz and that was when they both were on tour with Bow Wow. See Bow has not figured out that most people have selective memories. I remember when I was younger no one was bigger than bow Wow. I had his albums and all the vhs of his movies which for the most part were hits. However, like all teen idols times change and if you do not change then you are out. That is what has happened to Bow Wow,and he is so desperate to still uphold that image he maintained for himself he is making him self look foolish and like a little boy. This actually taught me allot about celebrity and fame.Fame is really fleeting,and does not last long. It is a drug and for people who fame has deserted they look crazy trying to reclaim that fame. The best thing Bow Wow can do is grow up and try getting behind the scenes or continue trying to get cast in some of these new shows  that are being made. However, I also realized that people have really short memories when it comes to celebrities and that may be the deadliest mistake of them all

Mom Shaming: It is still there just a little different

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Mom shaming is nothing new. The debate between the working mom and the career mom is still going on,and it probably will never end. However, mom shaming has changed drastically since there are really different types of families nowadays. The mother who has six kids is called selfish and an idiot for having to many kids even though she can afford all of them and spends equal time with each one of them. The mother who has one kid is also called selfish. She is apparently selfish for not providing another sibling to her kid,and that she will contribute to her child being a suicidal, weirdo when they grow up. Then it gets more complicated and even worse. The mom who adopts kids is not considered a true parent because they are not biologically hers. If she adopts outside of her race then she is fetishistic ethnic kids, or she is a betrayer for adopting outside of her ow kind. The lesbian moms and the woman who adopt by themselves are constantly harassed. They both are told how damaging they are to kids. Every time they post something about their families they are criticized and called stupid cunts, or idiotic leftist trash,and the worst monsters. The Lesbian moms especially have to fight allot harder because sometimes when an adoption agency looks at them they are rejected without ever opening their mouths. They are automatically deemed bad parents even when they do not have a chance to state their case.  The woman who d IVF also have to fight harder. Not only are they unsure if their bodies can go through with it,but they like the women who adopt are also deemed not true parents. If there is a surrogate involved then the situation gets worse. I cannot tell you how many post I have seen where a celebrity has had a baby through surrogacy and in the comments of applause there is the occasional you are not the real mother,and I bet you did not get pregnancy yourself because you aint want to gain weight.  The newest form of mom shaming is when a woman says they do not want to be a mom immediately the attacks come. She to is branded selfish for not contributing to the species, as if she belongs to the world. She is also called a monster for not wanting kids, like just cause she personally does not want kids she must also hate kids. She is constantly asked why she does not want kids,and every time she explains she is not being listened to and instead ridiculed. The most painful one I think is when people call this woman not a real woman. All of these examples really make me sick. These women did not ask for your opinions. They are doing the best that they can. Mothers Day is tomorrow and this type of behavior needs to end. It is time we leave people alone and stop being so damn judgmental.

No, It was not Sexism

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Last week everyone’s second favorite liar(after Phaedra Parks), Kellyanne Conway stopped by Anderson Coopers show to discuss all the drama going around with the Trump administration. As usual Mrs Conway was trying to spin everything Trump and his team does in a way to not make whatever they are being accused of doing look illegal and bad. This caused Anderson an accomplished journalist to roll his eyes at her. This caused Kellyanne to go on her home terf at Fox News to say she was a victim of sexism. I am sorry but when I read that I almost died from the hypocrisy. She thinks someone rolling there eyes at her is sexism but when Trump talks about grabbing woman she was ready to defend his ass. The hypocrisy is to much,y”all. Anderson was not rolling his eyes at Kellyanne because she is a woman. He rolled his eyes at her cause she was saying some dumb ass shit. That is not sexism, it may be unprofessional but it is not sexist.Sexism is stereotyping,and discrimination based on sex. Kellyanne being a woman had nothing to do with Anderson rolling his eyes. The fact that this is being used as an example of sexism bothers me cause there are actual instances of sexism that need to be taken seriously and no one does. Like do better Kellyanne Conway.

The Hypocrisy and the Genius of Comedy

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I have been waiting to write this because I honestly did not know where to begin. By now you all have heard about Colberts epic Trump take down on his popular late night show. He ended it by implying that Trump was Putin cock holding bitch. Now it did not take long for the outrage police to start trying to give out tickets. However, I was surprised by who was offended. The right wing it appears was the most offended. The same people who rant about college campuses are the same ones who want to #fireColbert. The most ironic part of this story is they said that Colbert was being homophobic. I am sorry I almost peed my clothes because that is the most funniest thing I have ever heard. These people who like to defend homophobic churches,and support these religious freedom laws have the audacity to call out homophobia. They are just as bad as the the Ted Cruzs of the world who like to go off on gay persecution in the Muslim world but have no problem attending a church where a pastor wants gays killed. The hypocrisy is to much with these people. Colbert is not homophobic and he was making a joke. I find it funny Trump can say he wants to grab women by pussies and they all say that is his first amendment right to speak,but get mad at Colbert. Now to be fair the left is full of the same bullshit as the right. Double standards exist on both sides. However, the point i am trying to make is comedy is suppose to be offensive, it is suppose to be scandalous. It makes you think. Thank you Stephen Colbert.